I am trying to follow a training schedule for a marathon next year. most of my runs the past two weeks have been on the treadmill in our basement. I don't include these in our total as it just seems like exercise running on a treadmill watching TV.
This weekend included a 6 mile run on my training schedule, but I was at my brothers house this weekend helping him with childcare as he worked. He and his sister-in-law suggested I try running at Lake Junaluska, so I plugged it into Google Maps and headed out on Sunday afternoon.
I may be getting this completely wrong, but I believe the Lake area is owned by the Methodist church and used for conferences and such. I was here before once because my brother and his wife had their wedding rehearsal dinner at a restaurant on the lake.
Once I reached the lake, I drove around for a while until I found a parking spot. This my the view starting out.
There is a nice path around the Lake, used by walkers, runners, some dog walkers, a couple stroller walkers, and a few bikers.
It was a beautiful 55 degrees out with just a slight breeze. It was a bit chilly in the shade but otherwise perfect weather for a run. The Christmas decorations seemed a bit out of place.
Another walking path
This bridge marked the 2 mile mark of my run.
A beautiful walking bridge.
Followed by quite a hill.
As I finished one lap, I found it to be around 2.25 miles, so I decided to make it three laps so I could round the total up to an even 25.
After two more miles, I faced the bridge again.
Wrapped it up at 6.8 miles.
This run was obviously different than the others I've chronicled so far. For one, it was a solitary run, my first without a bib. But I wasn't alone. A simple smile, a "beautiful day", a joke with an older couple about who would crest the hill first. Each of these things warmed my heart, and made the running just a little easier.
This was my first run here. This is where my brother lives, this is where his wife's family is. It is easy for me to go on with life as usual at home, but coming here it is real. Her absence is real. Their pain is real.
It has been a month since my sister-in-laws died. Her daughter is almost 6 weeks old. Her husband is working, her son is in school. Life is normal, a new normal. It wasn't supposed to be like this. I can't imagine what it is like for them. It is just starting to sink in with me that she is gone. It hasn't sunk in. It all just seems like a bad dream. Even after a month.
Even though I drove 540 miles to get here (coming from my Moms house). Even though I spent two full days caring for my niece before the run, it just started to hit me that this is how it is now. My running voices drowned out the Terri Gross podcasts streaming from my IPod. They let me know that this is just how it is.
One thing kept coming up again and again. Sadly, I've never really been close with my sister in law. And I'm sorry that I'll never get the chance to be.
The closest I ever felt to her was when we ran together last Thanksgiving on the B&A trail. I was just recovering from my first half marathon and she said she was really into a run/walk training program. I thought maybe we had something in common we could bond over, but when she got pregnant, that was the end of her running.
I do miss her. My heart aches for a relationship that I'm not even sure we had. My heart breaks for those who did. I know that she had so many close friends who miss her dearly. And I know that her family is devastated. I hope and pray for strength and healing for each of them.
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